Old Girlfriend

She was like an old girlfriend. Familiar but different somehow. No more pitchers and the jukebox had more of a hip-hop edge to it. But the crowd was friendly (at least at the beginning) a Nate the Bartender was his old gregarious self.

The inbound leg was memorable for the sprint down the Champs-Élysées (a.k.a. the Duck Ponds) and the multiple breakaways during the dash through town to the hitching post in front of Chelsy's. "You guys are going in there?" said the 14 year old couple hanging out with their infant child in front of the tavern. I guess we were an unusual sight down there - seven mountain bikers with all our gear and dressed in assortments of spandex and baggy pants.

Fine Art

But once we got through the awkwardness of it all and shoved the birthday boy (Sebastian) and the Chelsy's newbie (Antonio) through the door, it all felt very familiar again. The private back room was available for us to stash all our gear (helmets, camelbacks, lights, gloves, jackets, etc). The beer was cold. The air was smokey. The bathrooms were disgusting. The Chelsy's crowd was blue collar and friendly. And so we settled in for couple hours of easy conversation and  laughter.

But once we killed the Flying Fish draught (yum, and yes we killed it) we noticed the hour was getting late and the crowd was turning a little ugly so we ordered our traditional round of parting shots, toasted the birthday boy, and cashed out our $88 tab. We were a little flabbergasted by the amount (seven guys, two hours, beer, shots, and only $88?) so we left Nate like a 50% tip and made our exit.

WTF?

And so began the MTBUI phase of our evening (thanks Antonio). It starts with the getting on the bike part. After 3-4 beers and a round of shots, it always feels odd to be climbing aboard a mountain bike. At night. But once back on the Struble the pace line formed quickly which is ironic because at this point we are the last people that belong on a bike, much less a wheel-to-wheel pace line hurtling down the Struble in the dark at almost 20mph.

Once off the Struble and back on the dirt in MCSP, we lined up for the traditional soapbox derby race from the top of Dorlan Mill road. Seven riders wide, and full contact, this is always a barrel of laughs and generally a win for Sebastian. This time was no different. The return leg was also punctuated too many breakaways to count - near the end of the Struble, up Dorlan Mill road, up the backside of the dam, and the obligatory sprint for the Peterson Mailbox (BTW I am resurrecting the Peterson Mailbox Talley on the blog).

Home by 11pm and I presume we all stuck to our pinkie-shake-promise outside of Chelsy's to NOT take a shower when we got home (although I will admit I did put on a long-sleeve t-shirt and long pants before climbing into bed).

All in all a great night, I rated it a 148:
       43 (minutes each way)
     +17 (mph on the pace line)
     +88 (tab at Chelsy's)

See you on Sunday...

Clydesdales CAN Dance!

This year's event kicked off with a record 17 riders. Ridership dipped momentarily to 16 at the top of the bobsled run due to SM's "leave'm for dead" math but in the end we managed to avoid any major mishaps. Of course there were a couple of close calls, including an impromptu nose-wheelie-bailout that prompted one rider to comment "Clydesdales CAN dance!" In the end, all riders returned safely to base camp where we proceeded to ignite the bonfire and to see what surprises the post-ride festivities would bring.

They did not disappoint.

We'll start with "the contest." Last year's champion took a hiatus this year (sipping martinis with extended pinky finger), but competition was as fierce as ever and the crowd was split on the favorites.

• Entry #1 scored high in holiday spirit, craftsmanship, and creative incorporation of beer into the presentation. Bonus points for incorporation of a biking theme. The burn was only moderately intense but with very long duration.
• Entry #2 received a high score for debauchery, a deduction for a minor anatomical inaccuracy, and received a perfect 10 in the attitude department. The burn, initiated by special guest Henry Kissinger who really took the blowup doll by the ankles bull by the horns, was intense and scored high for leaving no trace except perhaps a couple of broken hearts.
• Entry #3 would normally have turned a couple of heads but struggled to get onto the judge's radar due to the caliber of entries #1 and #2. However points for effort and, yes debauchery.

The judges struggled to select a winner but after consulting the bylaws, were forced to disqualify entry #2 because beer was not physically incorporated into the actual entry (although there were some suggestions). So the panel awarded first prize and a year worth of bragging rights to...entry #1. Congratulations to MRDBS!

The competitive spirit of this group could not be contained as evidenced by this year's fire jumping competition (now an annual event thanks to AS' inspirational performance of '08). The kickoff was weak with a ho-hum corner jump but escalated rapidly into an impressive volley of middle jumps, middle jumps with beer smashes, and even some uphill jumps. And of course the inevitable bicycle-jumping phase ensued with some impressive performances turned in by two bikers and one blow-up doll, and resulted in only one chipped tooth ("Oh shit, I chipped a tooth"). But we proved yet again that there is no bar this group cannot raise (including the stupidity one) as the competition concluded with a first ever tractor-fire-jump that brought the crowd to their feet.

Around 11:00 the crowd had swelled to 20 and the kitchen served up 11 lbs of dead cow in the form of piping-hot homemade chili. Oh my God, this was just the ticket for a bunch of hungry bikers. The warm food calmed the rowdy crowd, we found our seats around the fire, and settled into more cerebral pursuits like "rip a new a-hole for anyone stupid enough to open their mouth" and getting all misty-eyed and sharing our fleeting memories of "J."

The group hung strong with very little attrition occurring before the first snowflakes fell around 2am (beginning of a nor'easter that dumped about 14" on us over the next 24 hrs). It was pretty cool - you could actually smell the snow. Things eventually started to unravel with a few disappearing acts (and a couple of reappearing acts which were met with much fanfare) and finally the dwindling group threw in the towel shortly before 4am.

Props to

• RV for trusting us on his first night ride, the snow-boarder helmet was a nice touch.
• KO for best decorated bike, festooned with tinsel and shiny dangley things.
• JA for best costume, allegedly borrowed from his nightstand "fun drawer."

And an event of this magnitude does not come off without a lot of help, so special thanks to:

• KO for letting us trash his back yard, again...
• MRDBS for his awesome catering, raising the bar yet again...
• DM for letting us raid his woodpile, and for sacrificing his tractor...

...and to everyone who made the pilgrimage. It takes some effort and lots of faith to turnout for an event like this in the middle of December, but the group makes the event and this year was a shining example.

Happy holidays and happy trails!

Newest Pagan Ritual

First a quick ride report: the 36 hour deep freeze resulted in some awesome fast trails and no mud whatsoever for our ride this morning. Of course there was the occasional deep frozen rut trying to twist the front wheel and eject you over the handlebars, and the unforgiving ground as hard as granite (found out the hard way), but it really was our best ride in weeks, maybe months.

A week from Monday (21st) is the Winter Solstice - the shortest day of the year and the official beginning of winter. It is also the root of some swell pagan rituals including the Feast of Fools, Navratri (nine-day celebration worshiping female divinity), and Sadeh (a mid-winter feast to honor fire and to "defeat the forces of darkness, frost and cold").

That puts our own Friday the 18th pagan ritual - the one that worships biking, bonfires, and beer - in some pretty good company!

Anyway I've stopped counting the RSVPs - the last time I checked it was in the high teens, so even if a few of you decide to wear skirts instead of spandex, we will have a solid turnout with enough loose canons to keep things interesting.

Friday's base of operations will be behind Kirk's house (114 Gottier) about 10 yards from the Struble Trail. I have provided a Google Map that shows you where to park, the location of the fire pit, and how to make the 482ft walk between the cul-de-sac and the fire pit. We'll get things rolling at 7:00pm - drop bikes, provisions, camp chair, and après ride gear at the fire pit - and be clipped in and pedals spinning by 7:30pm. That should get us back to the fire pit by 8:30 so we can have the opening ceremonies and commence the debauchery.

Stuff to bring:

• Bike gear for night riding
• Drink of choice (ice not necessary)
• Camp chair
• Après-ride gear like warm shoes, jacket, etc.
• Contest entry (if competing) - remember it will have to burn
• A short memory

A couple things for the new guys:

• If you will need a loaner light please let me know so we can track down a spare.
• If you have your own light, don't be stupid and forget to charge it.
• Right now the forecast is somewhere in the low 30s at ride time. This is not as cold as it sounds, you will be generating plenty of heat during the ride. The key will be "breaking the wind," so to speak. If you are new to winter riding, you might check this posting for a few tips.

We will be laying the fire and installing the brass pole Friday afternoon. Let me know if interested in helping out (and thereby getting dibs on upwind chair location).

So buckle your chinstraps and get stoked for Friday!

Chris

Mountain Bike Mud Football

Great ride this morning - sort of our mountain biking version of Thanksgiving mud football. Six riders, all grins, and nobody got winged by the hordes of hunters that were out there.

Moving on to some pending business...the 2009 FOURTH-Annual-Bike-Ride-Bonfire-and-Beer-Exchange is just around the corner. This event has turned boys into men, teenagers into frightened teenagers, and middle-aged family men into drunken middle-aged family men. In years past we've been blessed with some spectacular crashes and some spectacular women. Precious family heirlooms have been sacrificed and some of them have magically risen from the ashes. We've had firewalking (riding) and riders with women's underwear. But mostly we've just had a lot of fun, here is a sampling:

• 2008 - Flying Clydesdale
• 2007 - Nothing Good Happens after 2am
• 2006 - Defiled Again

We call it the "Beer Exchange" to provide some light cover for those of us whose wives may not be fully bought-in on this "riding bikes in the woods at night" concept. It puts it in the category, roughly speaking, of a traditional holiday cookie exchange. How could she say no? The format is pretty basic:

• A short night ride. No matter how hard some of us try, it is impossible to keep the group focused on riding when beer and bonfire beckons, so the ride usually lasts about seven and a half minutes.
• Ignite the bonfire. Expertly laid before hand, soaked with kerosene, and stoked with plenty of kiln dried lumber, this bonfire is a wonder to behold. SF wore flip flops one year if that gives you any idea.
• Beer "presentation" contest. I'd have to check my records, but I believe past winners have been DC, SM, and MR. If past years are any indication, this is a very competitive event so if you "bring it" be sure it's your A-game. Also keep in mind that it is tradition that contest submissions be burned in the bonfire - part of the sublime nature of this event.
• Oh, then we drink the beer and jocularity and debauchery ensues.

Let me make something else perfectly clear. If you can ride a bike and drink beer, then you are qualified for this event. The price of admission is the bike ride, but the ride is easy and expertly chaperoned. Lights are available if you need them. All of the hills on the route go down except for the ones that go up. All you really need is a bike, a helmet, and some beer.

We need to nail down the date so I will throw out Friday December 18th as an option to start the discussion. Let me know if you are willing and able to do that date. If you are willing but unable, then shoot me some alternative dates and we'll see what happens. Bottom line is get back to me so we can get this thing booked and order the strippers.

Oh and have a great Thanksgiving and be sure to leave room for pie.

Chris

O.G.C.B. Palooza Video Report

Ruth and Sara (my wife and daughter) called the OGCB-palooza rally the "old guy thing." They had it basically right, but that does miss some of more sublime aspects of yesterday's event. For example:

• Singles and gearies;
• 26ers, 29ers, and at least one 69er (some call them 96er but what fun is that?);
• Bicycles built for one and a couple built for two;
• Bikes with seats and bikes without (ouch);
• Geezers, youngsters, fathers, daughters, wives, old friends, and new;
• Coolers overflowing with cheap beer...Strohs, Mickey's wide-mouth, the newest expensive-sounding-cheap-beer Lionhead...and a few fancy-schmanzy beers to round out the selection;
• No bikes had a potato cannon, but I think it is just a matter of time.

Many thanks to Jim for organizing OGCB and to everyone else for rolling out the welcome mat for some new riders. I had a great time even though I left before the 3rd trip to the teeter!

Thanks again,

Chris

"Bikes, babes, and beer. Whenever life gets you down, return to the fundamentals"

-- Anonymous

Old Gear and Cheap Beer

OK boys so here it is -- the long awaited official announcement of the "Old Gear and Cheap Beer" mountain bike rally this Saturday. It is on home turf and is a totally low-brow event...so if you can swizzle a beer and balance a bike then no excuses!

Be Offended

I'm not sure if it sells any bikes, but you have to admire this bold advertising approach. Let's see if it meets the academic criteria for an effective ad:

1. ...must stop the reader from turning the page - check

2. ...works like a good salesperson, telling potential customers what a product will do for them - Emphasis seems to be on pretty bikes - check

3. ...has a sense of urgency, tells the reader to do something - My gut reaction was to quickly buy the bike to avoid getting sodomized - check

4. ...speaks to a specific group of people it is trying to reach - This must target middle-age-males who watched the 1972 movie Deliverance...a group that presumably has disposable income to spend on good looking bikes - check

5. ...is distinctive - check

Clearance sales and marketing gibberish about the latest technology just won't cut it for me anymore. 

Chris

"It won't make you ride better, it will make you ride more, and that will make you ride better."

-- Nippleworks ad

Positive Attitude

Three things.

#1 - Don't you admire this gal's attitude?  I mean like, I really dig bikes but she is really over the top.  

#2 - A couple of us plan to hit the trails tonight if we are lucky enough to get some snow.  We are keeping it fairly loose since the forecast is for snow changing to "wintry mix" sometime tonight.  We are suckers for snow but not for wintry mix.  If we go it would be sometime between 6:00pm and 9:00pm.  Let me know if you are interested and I'll be sure to keep you in the loop.  

#3 - Performance is running a pretty good sale right now on tools, clothes, components, accessories, bikes, etc (basically everything).  I was just over there and even got a 10% lunchtime discount on top of the sale price - a $40 chain cost me about a nickel.  Plus I got to rap with a new mechanic who custom built his fixed gear bike with "offset cranks" to solve a knee pain problem (Rob I will have to kick this one around with you).  

If you are in for #1 then you should probably keep it to yourself.  However if you are in for #2 you need to let me know promptly.

Chris

Flying Clydesdale

We kicked the off the 3rd Annual Bike, Bonfire, and Beer Exchange last night with the customary night ride.  After about 45 minutes banging around on slick but passable trails, our imposing 9 rider express train bombed the Quarry Trail and  started accelerating down the Struble heading for home (and of course the beer).  As most of you know, that section of the Struble is straight and level and encourages excessive speeds.  That stretch is also very muddy and when frozen is littered with rock hard ruts and gullies perfect for twisting a front wheel and violently ejecting a rider over the handlbars.  And yes, the "days since last crash" counter on the mo7s blog has now been reset.  Quipped one of our riders who had a bird's eye view of the crash - "it's never pretty to see a flying clydesdale from behind." 

Yes it rained...and it sleeted...quite a bit.  But that did not appear to dampen spirits at all, possibly due to some other spirits and our 8' rip roarin' bonfire stoked with a kiln dried treehouse.  I would like to recap some of the high brow competitions like the synonym game, the Angelina Jolie game, or even the other "game that doesn't have a name yet" but honestly I would not be able to do them justice, so I will focus on the less cerebral competitions:

Fire jumping.  Not that anyone we know would ever attempt such an insanely dangerous feat, but hypothetically, if some were to attempt this, it is apparently best to use someone else's bike. Also some extra momentum will apparently make up for insufficient altitude. 

Competition for best beer presentation:

• Entry #1 (reigning champion) - very large in scale (striking resemblance to a parade float) festooned with festive images not appropriate for this blog.  Very high marks for combustability.  
• Entry #2 - festive holiday theme, nice attention to detail, demonstrated high quality joinery and woodwork.  Bold use of family hierloom, almost backfired.  Very high marks for execution.
• Entry #3 - creatively combined carnal knowledge and sisterhood/brotherhood without quite crossing the line, very elegent in it's simplicity.  Very high marks for incorporation of negligee.  

Unfortunately entry #2 had to be DQ'd due to the "must burn to win" contest criteria (read the small print).  And while last year's champion was definitely competitive, the judges agreed that entry #3 set a new standard in debauchery and therefore must be awarded 1st prize. Congratulations CD.

Kudos to us because we managed to fit all this (and more) in well before the 2am deadline. Thanks to Kirk and Mike for cleaning this morning - it couldn't have been pretty.  By the time I got down there after lunch today, the only evidence was a still smoldering firepit.  

Chris

"All problems in mountain biking can be solved by going faster, except the ones that are caused by going too fast."

Finest Hour (not)

Cool nighttime temps so Sunday morning the trails were in pretty good shape.  I wish I could say the same for myself, not my finest hour (not my worst either, but definitely not my finest).  Was nice to see a few fresh faces we haven't seen in a while including Kirk pedaling up with a hot coffee in one hand and Coldplay on the iPod.

This week's forecast is for a double whammy of warm and wet, not terribly promising but we'll see.

Chris

3rd Annual Bike, Bonfire, and Beer Exchange

Hold onto your hats, it is almost time for the 3rd annual Bike, Bonfire, and Beer Exchange ("Beer Exchange" for short).  

The Beer Exchange is our answer to the ladies' annual cookie exchange where (reportedly) they sip wine and eggnog while listening to christmas carols and swapping Christmas tree ornaments and home baked confections.  Now don't get me wrong, I am not complaining about the cookie angle (I personally benefit from that), but the whole thing left some of us wondering if Lyndenwood was becoming, well, a little "light in the loafers." So we instituted the Beer Exchange - a physically demanding (barely), low-brow (totally), utterly unsophisticated counterpoint to the cookie thing  and an opportunity for our fellowship of bikers (and biker wannabees) to celebrate the holidays in a manner befitting our sport.

The 2008 Beer Exchange will be on Friday 12/26.  Our low-brow format will be pretty basic:

• Bike.  It's a night ride, short format.
• Bonfire.  It's a big one, behind Carl's house.
• Beer.  Bring your own.

The evening will also feature a repeat of last year's big hit - the contest for best beer presentation.  Steve ran away with first place last year with an assortment of beers and low-brow reading material presented in a magnificent Longaberger basket (which was promptly incinerated in the bonfire).  Top that and you may win an entire year of bragging rights.

And in case there is an impromptu trivia contest, you may want a refresher on the sordid history of the Beer Exchange:

• Defiled Again
• Run up to Beer Exchange
• Beer Xchange
• Nothing Good Happens After 2AM

More information will be forthcoming during the run up to the 26th - precise time, review of open action items from last year (yes, we had action items), weather details, etc.  Mark it on your calendar with a big black X, charge up your light, and notify the wife and children that you will be MIA on the 26th.  Note: A few loaner lights are available for those that may need them, let me know ahead of time so I can coordinate.  

17 days - but who's counting?

Chris

Nipples

'twas yet another a spectacular night for a bike ride but near disaster before the ride even began as KO's favorite neighbor decided to show off his red Corvette, mistook the gas pedal for the brake, and fish-tailed his way up Kaiser with tires billowing smoke, popped over the curb (to turf the neighbor's lawn), and finally came to rest in the middle of the road wondering if his fuel injectors had malfunctioned. When last we checked (smoke still clearing) he was still trying to back the dang thing into his garage.

We were expecting a record size crowd (I think we had about a dozen RSVPs) but wound up with half that - still a respectable size group that roughly doubled the customer base when we strode into Chelsy's. So apparently we have a few souls with good intentions who were busy last night paving the road to Hell. Summer is a busy time so a few MIAs are understandable, but we missed your jocularity and hope you can make it happen next time.

Once we rounded up our last rider (new nickname "nipples") we headed off to Chelsy's for a long overdue appointment with Nate. Of course he was his usual gregarious self so after a few pitchers and a round of sluts we left the customary 50% tip and headed home. We did the connector in both directions (slower on the return trip but relatively cleanly, except for one uphill endo). Other highlights of the ride included an emergency dismount on the bridge at the bottom of the Sole trail that left a rider standing upright, on the bridge, with his bike behind him. Also thanks to our lead safety rider diligently calling out the road crossings with "traffic!" or "clear!" or "punch it! ... if you want to!" Of course the "if you want to!" came a little late so the effect was just plain "punch it!" which made that particular crossing pretty interesting.

This weekend is a sweat fest and the riders last night were inclined toward an early start on Sunday, so we will say 8:00am departure from Upper. Hope some of you "good intentioned" guys can get a break from the paving detail and turnout on Sunday for some riding.

Chris

"If you're not having fun, you're doing it wrong."

Showboat

Good intentions were yet again overtaken by alcohol and debauchery when Riley failed to answer the bell Sunday morning. I feel like piling on more Irish references but that would be too easy so I won't. Thanks Bob for carrying the torch when our red headed immigrant from a small European beer and whisky drinking island nation couldn't.

We have a LATE BREAKING STORY -- the 2 year string of no-biking-related-trips-to-the-emergency-room has finally been broken (so you can relax). Summary - the incident occurred on Saturday, it involved a possible equipment malfunction (click here for illustration), no helmet, and perhaps a touch of show-boating. There are many more details, some possibly embarrassing, that add considerable color to the story and of course you are wondering WHO -- but as you know you have to show up for a ride to get the full report!

Now if THAT doesn't drive up attendance, I don't know what will...

Chris

"Pain is temporary, Glory is forever"
–Anonymous, but we heard it first from Rob

Chelsy's Goes Hollywood

Live band, open mike, and triple the normal Thursday crowd greeted us last night in our spandex and bike helmets. A few "old friends" were on hand (Cougar, pizza guy, Nate the bartender, and others) to make us feel right at home. Great night all around, and 14 degrees wasn't a problem once the numbness set in.

Our March roadie will be the 30th so lock it in. We will institute a standard roadie schedule soon so it is easier to plan.

This Sunday will be a "Roadie lite" - we'll be taking it over to Sunoco for the normal Sunday ride (10-12). I think we have been there once - parked at Downingtown Bikes. Since the place was overhauled, does anyone know of a better place to park (closer to the action, whatever)? Also anyone know of a decent map of the new layout (I will scrounge around at lunchtime but I figure if someone already has it...). Will plan to leave Lyndenwood at 10:00 sharp, probably puts us at Sunoco at 10:15 in case you want to meet us there (once we decide exactly where "there" is)... Let me know if you are in and stay tuned for more!

Chris

Nothing Good Happens after 2AM

A wise person once told me that "nothing good happens after 2am.". Based on my condition today, I think that person is very smart indeed. The last remaining brain cells we could collectively muster late last night concluded that it would be bad form for the kids at the bus stop to see us, so we threw in the towel at 4:30am. Brilliant.

Anyway thanks to everyone who turned out, we set a new high water mark of 13 riders and sustained only one mechanical. We did have at least two notable crashes - one in the mudpit at the top of the quarry trail, and one thudbuster at the bottom of the blue trail.

Winner of the "fancy presentation" prize goes to Steve. His gift basket presentation, complete with gift wrap and reading material was a big hit. Shannon however will not be seeing that basket again as it was subsequently used to stoke the fire.

Sebastian, who turned out in shorts and sandals, gets his trail. We just didn't get around to actually naming it yet - this remains on the team workplan as unfinished business.

Chris

Beer Xchange

Accuweather forecast for tonight:

• 33 balmy degrees at 8pm
• Temps dropping less than a degree per hour after 8pm
• No precip, no wind

With a vigorous ride followed by a raging bonfire and ample dose of vasiodialating alcohol, it will be a virtual tropical paradise out there so you might consider switching to rum drinks instead of beer.

Also anyone who wears flip flops tonight (a près ride) gets a trail named after them. Sebastian may get a trail anyway in recognition of wearing shorts for the Tuesday night ride in the lower-20s.

BTW we had a boatload of riders for Tuesday's tune-up ride (some faces we haven't seen in a while) so turnout tonight looks very promising. If you are on the bubble, remember this is a great night to jump into the mix (more emphasis on merriment than mashing the pedals). Also you have the option of joining us after the ride (price of admission may be a little good natured abuse).

See you guys tonight.

Chris

Runup to Beer Exchange

Important reminder, some weather info, and a couple of questions...

One week from tonight is the not-to-be-missed-second-annual-beer-exchange-bike-ride-and-bonfire. Details to come, just be sure have some beer on hand, your light charged, and cancel your Friday morning meetings and conference calls. It will be more beer than biking (so you truants should not be intimidated), but we have to do a respectable ride before we settle in around the bonfire, otherwise we are just a bunch of drunks.

Weather info from Accuweather:

• Tonight 8pm, 32 degrees, rain ending around 8
• Friday 4pm, 41 degrees, partly sunny
• Saturday 4pm, 30 degrees, snow starts and runs late into the night
• Sunday morning 30 degrees, rain in the morning

What this means for you mountain bikers:

• We haven't ridden since Sunday, so I for one am in for TONIGHT regardless of conditions. But I promised my wife and child no solo night rides, so if you intend to ride (please) let me know...
• FRIDAY HH conditions marginal, chime in if interested so we can coordinate tomorrow if enough interest.
• SATURDAY LATE AFTERNOON looks like the best conditions this weekend, fresh snow, cooler temps. Again, chime in if there is interest so we can coordinate.
• SUNDAY MORNING looks sloppy but it is tradition so no need to chime in, I know you'll be there.

Chris

Fair Hill First Timers

A proper recap of yesterday's ride has to include footnotes from the night before, both involving Irishmen:

Spontaneous beer drop due to failure of the opposing digit to grasp a beer. Accompanying slurred speech and balance issues suggest that keg beer may have been a contributing factor.

Last man standing entertaining the ladies into the wee hours of Sunday (they we duly impressed). Included late night departure and then unexpected return on the lawn tractor, to continue hydration and entertainment for the ladies benefit.

Both individuals overcame long odds and showed up for the early morning departure on Sunday, a little green around the gills but still game for a ride. True Irishmen!

Sunday departure went better than expected - only 12 minutes of "dorking around" - which is a record for a group of this size (10). For the one hour drive we ignored GPS and were treated to another "Sebastian back road special" which got us to Fair Hill in a little over an hour. Unfortunately the back roads also got one rider carsick, and he spent 5 minutes in the WaWa bathroom getting himself straightened out before the ride.

The ride commenced with a jaunt over to the orange trail to see what the trail guide meant by "rolling terrain with ocasional steep climbs." It was apparently a typo and should have read the opposite. We got a nice view of the practice track (made us tired just looking at it - it's huge) and eventually worked our way over to the east side of the park on some really sweet single track which included a pretty hairy and rocky descent (so much fun that we did it again later in the day). We had lunch by the river and were treated to the arrival of about 20 horseback riders complete with rider in chaps and another alledgedly displaying signs of a long day in the saddle (or excess saddle soap, still unresolved).

We experienced the normal course of mechanical failures and crashes. Notables:

• Crash resulting in turf being embedded into the sidewall of a tire. We are still puzzling over the physics of that one.
• Family jewels embedded into toptube of a bike. The physics of that one are readily understood by anyone with jewels.
• Jim wins the pink polka dots for this ride. For those of you familiar with the Tour de France, the pink polka dot jersey goes to the best hill climber in the mountains. Jim had no equal on the hills yesterday.

Overall a great day in the saddle even with all the navigational challenges (resulted in some dead ends and open field crossings). See the attached satelite image to view our track.

I think that covers the highlights.

Weekday ride schedule:

• Tuesday night (8:30pm) UL
• Thursday morning (6:30am) LL

Chris

This is Why We Ride

Perfect chemistry for today's ride - sun, cool temperature, and eight guys riding for pure fun (no "training" on anyone's mind). Even the baggage some were carrying from Saturday night did not slow us down. In fact one rider proved that it takes less than 8 hours to rise from the ashes (or the living rom floor) and jump big into a Sunday ride.

Highlights: SF made his presence known on the way to the dam when he blasted through the middle of the Sunday formation like a Corzine motorcade. A tumble over the side of the Sole Trail bridge (not Sebastian) reminded us all that no stream crossing can be taken for granted. A stop at Mike's drunken bike shop to do "something" to Matt's noisy bike proved fruitless. The action soon picked up when Riley led half the group over a really huge log drop and DC, always a gamer, followed suit and demonstrated a classic clipped-in-somersault over the drop and down the hill. Standing ovation and a trip to the chiropracter for that one! Not to be outdone, Mike Young planted a shoulder, hard, on the Eddie Trail to finally finish the downhill section of the ride. We ended with a mad dash down the Struble and grind to the clubhouse for the debrief. All in all a great ride and reminder why we like to do this stuff so much.

Regarding the customary monthly roadtrip, it is time to nail down a date for the first of '07. Mother's day is next weekend, and at least 5 of us have an Indian Princess event the beginning of June, so May might be a challenge. Anyway let me know what Sundays in MAY and JUNE would work for you - I will reconcile and reply with the date. We usually make these an early day so we can salvage some of Sunday for the family. Depending on destination, we leave around 7AM and get back by early afternoon.

Send me your dates and get back to work. Oh and don't forget rides this week:
* Tuesday 830PM from LL
* Thursday 630AM (note morning) from UL

Chris

Exciting Announcement

I have an exciting announcement to make regarding tomorrow night's (Thursday) ride...
We are instituting a new tradition (thank Sebastian) -- mandatory birthday detours to a local watering hole for celebratory a toast. Don't worry you will still get your fill of trail riding tomorrow - the current route is from UL through the horsefarm to the dam down the Sole trail to Dorlan Mill to the Struble for the dash to Downtingtown (and then back again).

The great news about this new tradition is that it takes the burden/guilt off our shoulders about how frequently we detour to the watering hole (there was much debate about "biweekly is too often but monthly not enough")! Now we know -- if a rider is having a birthday then we make the detour, period end of story. What could be more simple? I think this is known as "man law."

So as the first, Jim gets off easy but going forward each of you riders is responsible for invoking the "mandatory-detour-to-Downingtown-man-law" on your own behalf. Sounds corny but if you don't invoke, then we don't drink and that is not fun for anyone. So the protocol is to give the group at least 1 week notice of your birthday so we can designate one of the weeknight rides as a Downingtown detour and plan accordingly.

This is also a good incentive for everyone to get your friends into the game - with less than 10 *regular* riders, we will average almost 1.5 months between detours which is a long time. More riders = more detours. Think of it as a "finders fee."

OK back to plans for tomorrow... We'll be going to a dive bar on the main drag (Chelsea's I think it's called). So you will need a little cash. Not much since this is a quickie one beer sort of deal (remember the ride back?) and I don't expect Chelsea's will have much tolerance for spandex and headlamps anyway. If we stick to the one beer limit then this should add no more than an hour to the ride (+15min each way, +30min toasting). Let me say it again - the temptation for prolonged drinking is not a factor when you remember you are only halfway through the ride (and the 2nd half is mostly uphill).

As you know it will be chilly tomorrow, and the Struble leg is fast and it is exposed so dress accordingly. Finally I have a lock suitable for about 4 bikes. If anyone else has a lock please bring!!

Chris